First off, let’s just get this straight. This is a self-published book by an former Iranian Auto Mechanic who sincerely believes in God. If he gets burned for a lie, just keep it between ourselves Hollywood.
To set it up. His name is Tony Yarijanian, and he’s [insert]-years-old.
Tony believes in God but has a problem with himself. You won’t find it in the text, but for those of you who need help, it’s call subtext. Just please make sure to refer to him as human, For Jesus.
Tony works as an auto-mechanic in Hollywood, right off Glendale Blvd. He swears his cars work fine and that nothing is the problem with them. But there’s one big no-no, which he kinda makes obvious if you know anything about how sin theory works. Tony doesn’t really fix the cars, he just kinda covers up his mistakes with lies and a hefty bill, kinda like how a doctor would.
Our reporter, Amy Adams, interviews Tony to find out what happened. He denies everything, but word is he fucked up and had a car blow up on his dime. The heat is on, but he insist he’s innocent.
The Law sides on his case until his own moment to shine burst thru, when his own car explodes into a rage of flame, ensaring him in his own baptism by fire. Some need the mafia, some just a little dose of their own gasoline.
For Tony, it’s just a case of reaping what you sow. But damn if he doesn’t look better. Almost as if he has a thicker set of skin. Biceps ain’t bad either, if you ask me…
–Written by Tom Arnold, in case you think they make great doppelgangers. Just don’t shoot the messenger. Some prefer their own baptisms…
#Warning for the Z’s: Intense images of burned flesh and a man reborn. He’s hot and could use some water next time…
PS: Support his blog here: Tony’s 501 (c) (3)