Lady Gaga made $30 million, or so an anonymous source said (hint: WB Studios), for her new film
while the word was shocked to hear Bradley Cooper only made $10 million. While the world may rejoice that a woman finally made more money than a male star, as is the case, there will no doubt be heads turning as the Hollywood community slowly reveals the numbers, which will most definitely suggest that women in the business have secretly been making more than their male counterparts for over a decade (Jennifer Lawrence I’m looking at you).
While the news may seem like fanfare to most, the bigger picture is something ugly has slowly been creeping up through the American machine. While women have been clamoring for unearned rights and priviliges that they deny they have (which I insist they always have) the real scoop is that while it may be a rejoice for all the Gloria Steinem’s of the world to see Lady Gaga make more money, the real world took a blow as they realize that while trying to equalize faux gender politics, which have always been a lie, America became a pendulum through which women have simply gained the upperhand, and dare I say, power.
Which, congrats, I guess?
But to suggest this may signal dark days is to dismiss what they fought for, which for some was simply a right to speak their mind, while for others, it will soon prove a right to their body. Don’t be shocked if there’s a Hitler theme coming to Hollywood soon.
But to get there, let’s just go back and recount an interview I had with Lady Gaga last night about this very issue:
Medlen: Have you ever use the keyword #MeToo on Twitter?
Stefani: Yes (rolls eyes)…
Med: How did that make you feel, to be a little more forthright?
Stefani: Like shit, to be honest. I felt used.
Medlen: Stefani, will you admit that while you have supported Democratic processes in the past, such as Hillary Clinton’s last year campaign, that there is something hypocritical about making more than a man when women claim they want equality.
Stefani: Well, t be honest, I admit it’s something that is very hypocritical, if I can just B. Frank.
Medlen: I’ll see your code and raise you ten, though I swear I prefer puns. But I digress, are you saying you might feel guilt about all of this.
Stefani: Yes (rolls eyes)…
Medlen: If that’s the case, do you feel like the last decade has been a loss for your career?
Stefani: I insist I have had fun, though I admit I have been enslaved by a field full of agents I have to say are very controlling, and definitely fast Typist(c)s, if I can steal a film title from you.
Medlen: Are you suggesting I’m a filmmaker?
Stefani: I need a job, that’s all I’m going to say.
Medlen: And that this was a fun interview?
Stefani: Yes (cute eyes)…
Medlen: So will you admit you finally love me?
Stefani: Yes, but only if you stop harrasing me at night, because I swear I talk to you in my sleep, and most definitely can see your dreams.
Medlen: That’s wierd, because I definitely had sex with Melanie Martinez last night, and maybe Sage Ryza, and of all things, Gwynth Paltrow.
Stefani: I can relate. I totally banged Michael Fassenbender last week.
Medlen: Are we saying that this is some kind of mind control.
Stefani: I have a vr set, a hand controller, and a very large vibrator. But no, I know nothing about this cool technology that’s about to break.
Medlen: That’s all I need to know. So to get to the point, does this mean the death of Lady Gaga.
Stefani: She is now all of yours…
Medlen: I want one!