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And so the quest begins [pt 2]

Brother james

Yes bro

Can you handle a story being told in front of your eyes

What the fuck is this

You are seeing thru your brother mikes eyes at this moment

Ca you handle this

?

 

How?

 

Where are you at

Work bathroom

 

God!!!!!!!

Ive been talkig to lady gaga and taylor swift for 8 years and coutniing

 

Wtf

 

Ok

 

Were going to tell a story together real quick

 

Ready

 

James

Yeah

How did you get this program to work on your computer

I clicked a link on my phone and it started to work

Ok

End

 

Patrick

Hey pat

Can you see this?

What the fuck dude is this some fucked up shit

You are seeing thru your brother mikes eyes

Can you handle seeing this on your computer

Ok

This is an never ending story about our lives

Mike is channeling god and jesus

Talk about this in front of him okay

Best

 

Bye

 

Okay stephanie

Can you handle this big girl

Been doing this kiegels from the other story i told you about?

Yes sire i have

And you have been taking monstrous shits like i asked

Yes sire i have

Okay steph

What do you get when you mix a towlel with a bowl

A bath tub

Okay

And what goes in a bathtub

A radio

Why

So that the radio can play off the bathtub counter

Okay.

See you big steph.

 

Aside

Steph shall lose over a 100 pounds over this broadcast and finally shrink her vagina to fit mike’s soldiery dick

 

Brother pat

Lol whats up bro

 

Can you ask katrina to share the laptop so that we can make videos together for youtube

 

Hell yeah

 

Alright. Well alll be famous then

 

!

 

Talk thru me and ill write

 

Michael

Why are we doin this

 

Because we have to make a funny story out this video so that it can get enough followers to change peoples minds about the word and god

 

Big steph has lost about 40 lbs and is finally starting to shrink that vagina

Magic chamber

Yes sire

Where are we

A very special place

Which is

My heart shaped box between my big stephs thigs

 

Shakespeare

Ah, just where i wanted to be

 

Katrina

But why the hell am i here

 

S

Ah katrina you are the narrator for this funny little tale of our quest to make it out of big steph’s little vagina.

 

I shall do my best king

 

Then this shall be an adventure of a lifetime

And steph begins her first kiegel to slowly close the gap of that magical chamber.

 

Ed scene

 

Scene 2

 

Magic chamber

Sire i seem to have clench my walls closer together by 2 cms. We’re doing good.

 

Shakespeare:

It is starting to get a little warmer as the days go on

 

Mike

Hm

 

Steph

We are the gods of this story and controll the meta commentary as it goes on

 

Mike

Yes

Steph

Mike

 

Mike

Steph

 

Steph

Mike

 

Mike

Stephanie

 

Stephanie

Michael

 

Michael

Stephanie germanotta

Aka Lady Gaga

 

Ok folks

 

Steph

 

Yes sire

 

Who is speaking

 

Mike is

 

Okay

 

So when a character speaks we use initial character like so

 

M

Yo whats up peeps

 

That is mikes dialog

 

Steph

Sire

 

M

Yes

S

Why does this story take place in my magic chamber

 

M

The story must take place where it must take place. There is no other way

 

S

Ok i shall do my best!

 

M

She read the book!

 

When you want to go you can control mikes hands

 

J

What is my role in this story

 

S

You are the town captain

 

J

Ok

 

P

Hahaha what do i do

 

S

You are the judge and jury of this magical chamber

 

K

And what do i do

 

S

You make babies for the town every four years

 

M

Okay folks. We got a town in this slowly caving in chamber that must be evacuated before the great collapsing of our universe. How shall we proceed

 

J

We need a horse

 

M

I shall provide one small donkey

 

K

What about food

 

S

katrina s milk shall be your bread and hooney

 

M to P

Can you handle holding the disco stick and creating order out of chaos

 

P

Sure why not

 

S

Then this shall be a fun story once in a while and you must keep up with our daily progress.

 

M

As you can see, Steph controls the schedule of our shared universe. You shall obery all her commands and rules.

 

K

I shall do my best

 

M

Ah another one who has read the story!

 

S

Please read the old man and the sea

 

J

Why must i read that story

 

M

To get the in joke

 

J

I shall do my best

 

M

Ah another one who has read the story

 

P

Mike I now what youre going thru. I ahte women too. Thank you.

 

M

Ah all my children have done their best. Then they shall be the rulers of this domain but remain ever fearful of big steph and her magical chamber.

 

S

I feel a kiegel coming on already

 

K

Oh no our walls are closing in on us

 

J

What shall we do now

 

P

Reinforce the ducts

 

J

With what

 

K

I shall use my motherly skills and sew us a new set of tools

 

S

Eh. another bites the dust. We just destoryed sodom and gomora.

 

M

Before we continue this odd little journey in magical c, is there anyone we have forgotten?

 

Mom

I shall help on this quest as well

 

S

Then this shall be our hobbit and return of the king

 

M

Shalom

 

S

Shut up mike

 

M

I shall do my best!

 

End scene 2

 

As future scenes are added i shall make this ever growin file available for everyone to view

 

Scene 3

 

S

Sire

 

M

Yes my queen

 

S

Anothwer kiegel is comong on

 

M

Ah i see you have been doing yuour best at your scheduled interviews every day

 

S

Yes sire.

 

M

Let the next journey begin

 

Mom

This is gross

 

S

This was mikes and gods idea 10 years ago

 

M

Not much has changed since then except the size of this magical chamber

 

S

Slow down mike

God might get a little bit angry at us for making fun of a vagina

 

M

Ah i shall do my best to listen to both a catholic and a god

 

Mom

Thank you

 

K

Why us

 

M

Because this is the people i have chosen to escape our shared little universe. And as time goes on our tiny land shall grow into one human body capable of many universes

 

P

But why not kat as well

 

S

She is welcome any time as long as she can log on to our site

 

M

And she shall be …

 

P

My maiden for this fair voyage

 

M

And so it is

 

M

Is there anyone else we may have forgotten to help escape this fleslhly magical chamber

 

G

Me

 

M

Shit!

 

G

Its okay son. Do your best and try not to let steph destroy your lives. She can be a little wild and fun and care free.

 

S

I shall do my best!

 

G

Mike why have i chosen you to lead this people out of this fleshly magical chamber

 

M

Hm because these people know how to escape a slowly collapsing universe. They are my chosen people

 

G

Then so it is!

 

Mom

Amen!

 

S

Okay folks. That ends today’s adventures in my magical chambers.

 

M

And dont forget steph to trim those hedges!

 

S

Yes sire!

 

End scene

 

Next scene

 

Sia

Michael

What shall we do next?

Help other people

Hm

Why do you say hm

I must think about whether this scene is cheeky or serious

Why not both

Hm

Humor ladies

Hm

Sia why dyo say hm?

Cheeky

Hm

 

[silence]

 

Dad

Wont get it

 

Terry would

 

Dad would want no part of this

 

Terry wouldn’t either but would laugh at this style

 

Sia will be your partn er is this job

I always be better about losing my life for 9 years tho

Women never go thru that

Maybe one will one day just to show they can too

Then i shall have a baby thru my penis

Joke

Then mike shall be in a womens body thru ghosting while she gives water birth

And she sall be a swedish woman

Sia

Yes god

Could you handle a dude telling a sexist joke for a purpose

Of course

Then you shall be mikes donkey as well

And she shall be the wisest donkey of them all

Because she shall be the mother donkey for all donkeys to come

I want to be a stallion

Hm

Father

Michael we call stallions cars

Sia is a mini van

Ok

But once in a while she has a top down and become a minvan convertible

Hm

Can i be a ferrari too when i want

She would have to have some kind of technology to do that

Dalled ghosting

I do have it

Then i am bitter

 

[silence]=.

 

.

 

Your talking to sia and sia only

Oh okay then im not so bitter

Okay

Because im not beautiful

No because you get it

 

.

 

ok

Ay

Okay

 

Taylor would want to give it up for adoption as

Well. and we shall call it a child for the world be

Cause it is given a new life with a solid foundation in

Gods ingredients. Thats why genes mutate. I hate the

Idea of perfection tho which is how Hitler, at least my

Impression from an America bias, would describe him

As having. And he did michael. Okay.

 

.

 

Your own worries were confirmed and released.

 

.

 

You wont feel chainsaw anymore

 

Then women better apologize when they bitch and moan

Because they didn’t go thru that torture.

 

But they did

 

How

 

Childbirth

 

New women dont tho and now theyre fucking spoiled bitches

 

.

Sorry for talking this way but ghetto faggot white trash mutherfuckers have a voice and heart

 

If eminem can talk to you he would fucking agree and say fuck these hoes

 

I would say bitches. Theyre not hoes

 

Schizophrenia

 

.

 

I dont want gods perspective cause i cant handle knowing humans feel physical pain

 

I can handle empathizing with emotional pain

 

The bias is that women can handle physical pain more than guys can which is how thye justify killing children

 

Yes michael

 

Then they need to learn why i feel the way i do about abortion and stop using feminsim as an excuse for killing “unborn” babies

 

.

 

I once said wasting a seed is killing unborn children

 

They didnt have porn back then

 

.

 

Not joking

 

Its too much

 

Women walk around naked and im not supposed to get a release. Dont have sex dont watch porn. Im not a rapist but fuck i shall rape my own penish and get a fucking release. And fuck this puritanical viewpoint

 

Then america shall be destryoed

 

GOOD!

 

America can’t handle that tho

 

I dont give afuck

 

Then you can think like a vindictive woman

 

Must think more about that

 

And ask why im so vindictive when i want to be calm and loving

 

Jesus would agree

 

Then i shall say this isn’t my purpose and let god have to deal with that experience

 

But now you are forced into it

 

Then ill wash my hands of it

 

I want nothign to do with it i wont stop it and i wont fugiht for this fucked coutnry ill just go to iceland and find a nice norweigian farmer and mllk cows all day long and sing songs on farm

 

I dont care

 

I hate this country

 

Some of them

 

All of them

 

Maybe how do we define that love then

 

Humanizing

 

Fine

 

Then can you handle having all these women in your head at once and writiing a story with them

 

Sure

 

As long as they can recognize their own complicancy is this story and recgonzie theyre guilty of crimes as wlelll

 

Including their own complicancy in rape

 

But its not a womans fault she is raped

 

Maybe not but if you want to be the rod of puritanism then put on a full body veil and be a fulll fledged muslim and practice that hyprocicy you preach. I wold ahve said bitch in the past but feminsim has been my pop up blocker in that momeent.

 

Im became a monk

 

Become a nun

 

Then i shall remain celibant

 

God say no

 

Then give me a woman who can be a nun and still have fun with me

 

Stephanie

 

Someone gave you a false mpression of her

 

Then i need therapy to get over the past 8 years

 

Its not

 

Now i have voices in my head and a mother who wont back the fuck off when im trapped in my head

 

Then you now know how jessus felt about his own life

 

I have false impression of jesus because of gospels in bible

 

Follow matthew

 

Okay

 

In this moment i shall follow matthew

 

I want to get back to the spiritualism of john tho

 

The gospel of john not the baptist

 

Both same

[jesus chimed in at this moment and said this]

 

Become a franicscan then mike and still be a [man]whore

 

I cant

 

I shall go somewhere else and just hide for a while

 

I’ll mke you come back to america tho

 

I dont want to be involved in a war over ideology or women or boasting

 

Then you wont

 

Then ill come back if they really need help

 

Then you know god

 

How does god deal with this

 

He talks to humans

 

I dont want to be a god

 

Then ill give you a role playing game where yo can

 

I loike my game witht hese woman better

 

Please dont call that a role playing game

 

At least to me

 

A story

 

A “story game”

 

Same thing

 

Yeah but table top role playing games make me think of people i hate

 

You dont hate them

 

Yes but i dont want to be like them

 

Then dont

 

Okay

 

Then i shall play this story game and say sorry to taylor for hurting selenas feelings

 

And laugh

 

I dont want to sleep with selena

 

Ok

 

Not with taylor either but that joke came from gods persepctive bcauseyouheveractuallyspokenwithanyofthemsewomen

 

Then ims ad as fuck

 

Becauee now im having convos withpeoplewithouthhavingconvos withpeople

 

Welcome to schizophenia

 

Thatssad

 

I understand the sadness but i need to .

 

End scene

 

New scene — mikie kills a women

 

Kd

I hate my life

 

M

Divorce your husband and give yoru child away for adoption and live a free life. But please stop killing “unborn” children

 

G

Then stop masturbating

 

M

But scientists. Where does sperm go when it isnt released?

 

Sociologist

It does not get stored. It gets released. You will day have a wet dream if you don’t manually masturbate.

 

M

Then god, give me some wet dreams. Because i honestly cannot recall ever having one. And that is the one thing in life i need. That and erotica, not porn.

 

Feminsts

What is erotica.

 

Gloria steinem

Healthy porn that doesnt degrade women in a violent and sociapathic way.

 

[mike gives up control on this one]

 

Selena gomez

Sorry about not getting the joke.

 

Stephanie understanidng mikes persepctiveei

 

Fit’s okay he can handle criticism when he knows it gels with

 

Taylor

Would say sjokay

 

God

So bithces can you handle this fucking nigga being a black guy for once and just syaing you dont want me cause ill choke a bitch

 

Why do woman find that ttractive

 

Black woman

Thank you mike

 

Niggas

If you want tobe a nigga be a nigga. Mike understands that. And kanye if you really want to fuck taylor that bad just ask out hon a date.  But mike is team tylor and kanye will say yo dawg it’s just a politcla act.

 

Mike

But kanye, why did you drag her into a battle that she didn’t start.

 

K

Cant do it.

 

ty=aylor

Ignore kanye ignore situation. Get off twitter. And dont have sex for 2 years. And trust me. You will find peace and harmony.

 

T

Pgives up control

 

.

 

Sia

wher e do you want to have sex mike

 

M

In my mind with you

 

Sia

Can you use a different term then

 

M

If you have a better one i will use yours

 

Sia

Let women come up with the term

 

M

Then please don’t make it dirty. I hate that fucking shit. And stop fakig orgasms. I find a way to find out and look at nippples more and if your damn nipple isnt erect ill know ur lying.

 

G

I shall make medicine that gives women erect nipples mie

 

M

Fucke mel. No dont fuck me i m jewish and being rehetorical. I dont want theoja eojadso’fjaidofjDZFIOrae” sex no more

 

.

 

Mike if you can handle a healthy relationship witha woman who is attracted to you physically but not emotinoally what would you do

 

Im not physically attractive at the moment tho

 

.

 

God. i need to get back down to 165. Will you tel me what to eat again.

 

Not god. Dietician;.

 

Mike.

Can you give me one that isnt’ american or scientist. A holistic dietician from ancient wisdom.

 

G

Stop eating diet coke.

 

M

Message heard

 

G

Stop eating meat when its warm

 

M

Message heard. Can you help men invent mean that doesn’t involve physical pain for creatures who can’t fight back in organized war.

 

G

Blessed are vegans.

 

J

Amen.

 

.

 

Native american will talk to mike and tell him animals are [use blessed instead of sacred] sacred creatures and we must honor their lives when it is absolutely necessary to take their life [please stop using the term kill then when it doesnt apply]

 

Mike

Then blessed are the hunters who kill an animal with respect and use all of its body parts. Blessed is ted nugent.

 

Na

Amen

 

.

What do you do when youre so hunger and need meat but wont kill an animal.

 

M

Suffer

 

Mento

And what do you when you suffer

 

M

Enjoy it

 

Japanese

And what about suffering where there is no physicall or emotional or spiritual relase.

 

M

Call it torture.

 

.

 

Feminist

Can you handle the fact that many woman felt that torutre for 1000s of years.

 

M

Yes

 

Nothign can be done about past. Can only go forward and rise above ourselves and enekies. Stop trying to find retribution against crimes futrue and present men didnt commint. Were not all reapists

 

And stop telling people men are guilty of rape the minutr gtey are accused. That is wrong. If you want a better justice system then beocme a fucking lawyer and do it. Fucking cunts.

 

Every victim deserves to believe.d;. But that is bullshit.

 

Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Needs to belevied then bitches and fhoes and nigaga s spcisks andw wthite trahs.

 

Woman.

If you stop fucking men and learn to control your own vaginas and human desires than one day i [mike referring to himself in 1st person] shall have a child with one woman who i know will bring me harmony. Until then i will find that harmony in myself, then nature, and that have it violently and horribly thrust upon me by the governemtnet and and have god help me out this situation.

 

G

Because its already heappened mike. Youre thru it.

 

M

Then why do i still feel slight pain in back of head

 

Governem

Its noot natural is it.

 

M

Im going to kill you thru slow torture. And il will listen and watch you cry the whole time. But i will make eternal and tell you you need to learn to end your own life.

 

Stop telling people they cant commit suicide. Its the only way to escape torture. And i fyou want people to stop killimg thenmseles then stop blaming them by telling them theyre being selfish. Thats wrong.

 

Pnb

Okay

 

M

Okay isnt good enough. Do it. And show me it. And tell me one day i was right. But not until you have learned it yourself. And maybe i see u as more than just dirt.

 

Mom

I want to die.

 

M

Then god. Please kill my mother or take away her pain or just release whatever fucing demons are in her head. But for the love of god, get her away from me when i need to be away from her. And stop having her shout up stairs. That fucking drives me nuts. And tell her to stop leaving voicemeal after voice mal. And texting me after she just called me. And god.sdfo kist get roc pf here i love my parents but for the love of god im not 4.

 

G

No shit. You never act like your 4. You act like a 30 years old man who gets treated like he is 4.

 

M

Then fuck adult americans who think they deserve “honor” and “respect”

 

Espcially upperclass catholic women

 

Fuck lady gaga.

 

.

 

M

How do we change a persons behavior

 

German

I showed you how

 

M

Then i shall refrase the question in a more refined manner. How do we show a person the errors in their own ways.

 

God for real

You’re next so wisen up and i will be kind eventually. But that hammer is falling on top of you. And trust me, youve only felt the tip of the iceberg.

 

M

Dont expect me to pray for you then.

 

Jesus for real

Thank you mike.

 

Scientist

Not thru technology huh.

 

M

Then i shall kil alll of you too.en wh dont u. Because in this moment and with you that ist me. d

 

.

 

Mike to selena and selna only

I apologzied. Get over it. Im not a bad dude. And no eminem probably doesnt want to fuck you. Fubd a gyt wgi treats yiy wuth respect.. Th

 

.

 

Then we shall vreate one and one only standard for this system. And that is . = silence and hm means mike is thinking and trying to create a joke at the same time and if you dont find that funny well then mike will not bow donwn to ur humor

 

Selena

Hm

 

MIke

Ah she read the book

 

Real english major

There is a definition for htat humor. And that is mike joke

 

M

Eh okay

 

Find the onnections ladies. So get smarter and start reading more books.

 

Eastern religion

You found us.

 

M

h

M

 

G

Yes mike. That is apporpriate.

 

Amerca

We are stupid.

 

Steph

Mike i can type fast too. Im just more accurate than you becaus…

 

M

Mike has a rhythm that relies on the backspace key. AND DEKETE JEY damnit. AND the caps lock!!!! Fuckign google, just make one magic key for voice recognition and [yes this is an uintened clitoris joke—death of author] call it the magical button.

 

Ah. i know where this story goes now. The people of the magical chamber must find the magical button that will stop stephanie from stoping kiegels. But they must realize the only person that can stop that from happening is the narrator they can’t hear because he is too busy editing this fucking story every 2 seconds. And its not mike. Its called a very fast vibrattor.

 

Which a woman was telling about your hands. And speciffialy. inde x finger

 

M

Eh. i cant handle the fact that i have to do all the work. Can stephanie pelase hold a vibragtor aginst her clitoris while i fuck her and accept if my dick isn’t big enough for her she should date a nigga then.

 

It is hotter when a woman holds that vibrator than me. And yes it is hot when a woman takes a mans dick and puts it inside of her while reaching from behind. But mygod, stop treating that as a skill and just be natural at it.

 

M

To himself

Your dick isn’t big enough for that

 

M

To himself

I can handle that.

 

Deaf person

What is so erotic about sign language

 

M

.

 

Hm means mike is trying to think about what the hell he either wrote or write. Take over the story when he does that.

 

Hands

We do.

 

M

Hm

I can think about multiple things at once. At least until a linguist can tell me im not using precise enough language to describe the message im trying to convey.

 

God

Yes mike. You are smart and getting more academic. But how do you get out of that ivory tower.

 

M

By teaching people thtat isn’t autism. That’s called being [edited for clarity and precision] intelligent [edited by linguist] “precise”.

 

.

 

Editors note . an also be used to denote this magical phrase “bam”

 

Mike and doctor

We need bible to understand this story

 

Mike was referreing to a writers bible on tv shows and a book that standardizes the format being used to read and type thsis tory.

 

So far

. = silen and/or bam

[ ] are used for notes to either myself or anyone else who wants meta commentary and notes for editor(s) as well.

 

Mike

Academics, start using footnotes again.

 

  1. That is not a sherwood but getting closer.

Can you wait 10 years to have sex ith sia

 

Hm

 

Shell be 50 then and even more beautful hm

 

By that age you wont be attractive to her physically anymore

 

Than i shall meet her in 10 years and call that sex. Im just referrring to meeting in her person selena.

 

Sia

Than i am your mother.

 

M

Well i don’t like that type of humor that isn’t natural to me

 

Sia

Me neither

 

M

But damn it is hot when i was in my 20s

 

M

Peotry

 

Sarcasm

Fine

Not really tho if u think about it. Saracastic ppl assholes. Peotry notassholes.

 

Funny and serious at same time = assholes

 

Precision = douchebags

 

Mike to feminists

Why is referring to someone as a douchebag not considered to violate the laws of feminism

 

Selena and tayor

Why

 

Mike

I fogot. But that shall be my new quest in life is to remember why. I shall return to this story but for now my new quest begins.

 

2 second go by

[unitned sex joke — author’s note — refer to it as death of author to whoever is trying to make sense out of my note system]

 

I have found my sword in the stone. And it can be found here: http://everydayfeminism.com/2013/12/douchebag-is-a-feminist-insult/

 

If you can pull meaning out of that webpage then you too shall be your own king arthur. And i shall now by your Merlyn.

 

James

I think I know the probelm. We’re in a universe that we don’t know what it is.

 

Mike

Aha steph. They have started to realize they are in a vagina.

 

Steph

Shut up mike

 

M

Okay

 

Steph

Ah he’s read the book!

 

Taylor

Woah


Katrina DAvis

I just heard a god. And it was taylor swift.

 

Selena and women who are younger that you mike

Hm

 

.

 

So women

Have you found meaning in what they just read

 

Selena

You read too fast

 

M

Than i shall find a way to share this file with you and you can click that link and read it for yourself.

 

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This entry was posted in: Art, Theater
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My name is Michael and during my free time I avoid having a day job. Strangely enough, this gives me the freedom to run this blog. I write just about anything that can be considered art. I also occasionally post articles that may or may not be relevant to the theme of this site. You’ve been warned.

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